conclusion for the bad and lousy week:
my week is screwed up. no fun at all.
i tried my best to get back on track,
but in the end ...
i know it very clearly that if i don't wanna help myself,
others can't help me.

my attitude is getting worst,
as in the attitude towards my fellow peers.
i possess a very unusual side of me,
which is i know it's very abnormal.
how come? it's because of emotions.
my emotions were greatly affected on that particular day,
and bastards like him is still out there disturbing me.
i cannot take this as a joke. why?

i have been taking little things seriously.
people claim that what they have joked about are all jokes,
especially when they make jokes sound so real.
my patience has its limit.

damn it, i have been spouting vulgarities in chats and blog posts.
you can't count all of the vulgarities in my posts for these 4(?) days.
bet it's like ... a great handful of them.

i sense devil in me, suddenly.
he's telling me to become a bad-ass.
i sense angel in me too.
she's telling me to stay in my own position, and continue to be a good soul.
i hear them fighting so fierce,
that the fight has gotten me in a pathetic state of confusion.

close friends around me have said that i'm becoming very emo these days.
-(refer to wednesday's post)-
they have asked to me to cheer up and be happy.
yes i've tried, but not hard enough.
soon, very soon, you will see the old me again,
and i use my friendship and family-ship to promise you all people.

so after the lengthy part, let's get to the actual part.
it rained today morning, unexpectedly.
getting cold, because the wind blew by.
i wanna sleep, but i couldn't enjoy my rest.
i kept getting up and getting back to sleep.
it's seemed very obvious that i'm troubled.
i went for lunch with the guys in school.
well at least i don't have to eat the same old thing again and again for lunch right?
(sorry, no offence)

i went home, and when i was on my way, i met yan meng.
soon after, i left him because he saw his friends.
i was dead beat when i reached home.
i played a little bit of maplestory,
then daddy called to remind me to pay the misc. fees by 4pm.
as you know, i have a short-term memory,
so i decided to stroll down to the town council to make my payment.
then i went to top up my ez-link,
as i'd used up all the credit inside on monday.
then i got home, and surfed the net for a little while.

then i went to lie on my parents' always-comfortable bed to rest.
for not more than half-an-hour, i closed my eyes and slept.

i got up at 4pm plus. then i surfed a little while more,
then headed back to maplestory.
then i went out for my dinner-hunt.

when i was strolling to macdonalds,
i saw acer and wai thong playing baskbetball.
i was frightened (suddenly),
so i quickly entered the restaurant.
soon after when i removed the right side of my earpiece,
i hear bernard from 4T1 calling ah gua (who, to them, is me).
i ignored, and i inserted back the earpiece into my ear.

then i got out of macdonalds,
and i told myself that i screwed up my evening.
on the way back home,
i kept telling myself that i screwed up my week,
and it's all my fault because i screwed it up.

i'm in a state of torture.
will he come back to me?

friend, it's either you grab this chance or just let time reveal the answer.



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